She Moved In, Refused to Work — and Now I’m Paying for Everything
Living with someone you love sounds like a dream… until you’re the only one paying for it.
When Lily moved in with me, I truly believed we were taking the next big step in our relationship. She had just quit her job, and I told her it was okay to take a little time to figure things out. I never imagined that months later, I’d still be covering everything — while she spends her days glued to Netflix and TikTok.
Now, I’m financially drained, emotionally exhausted, and seriously questioning whether I’m just being taken advantage of.
When Moving In Turns Into a Full-Time Sponsorship
Lily (23) and I (Jake, 25) had been dating for eight months before she moved in. She said she needed a fresh start after quitting her job, and I agreed to help. I even told her she didn’t need to worry about rent right away. I figured she’d get back on her feet quickly.
At first, she helped around the house — cooking most nights, keeping things clean — and I appreciated that. But I soon realized I was covering everything: rent, groceries, utilities… even her phone bill.
She claimed she was job hunting, but when I asked how many applications she’d sent out that month, her answer stunned me: five.
“You Don’t Support My Dreams”
When I asked her to treat the job search more seriously, she got defensive. She told me the job market was tough and then revealed she actually wanted to become a freelance graphic designer.
I supported the idea. But instead of building a portfolio, finding clients, or learning new skills, she spent her time on social media and binge-watching shows. I suggested she could still chase her freelance goals and get a part-time job to help us both out.
That’s when she snapped — telling me I didn’t support her dreams, that I was treating her like a burden, and that I didn’t believe in her.
Silent Treatment and Second Thoughts
Since then, things have gotten cold. She barely speaks to me, and when she does, it’s short and distant. Meanwhile, I’m working overtime, my savings are shrinking fast, and the pressure is building.
My friends think I’ve been more than reasonable. My sister, on the other hand, says I’m being too harsh and not supportive enough.
But honestly — how do you support someone who won’t even try to support themselves?
Can Love Survive When It’s One-Sided?
I still care about Lily. But right now, I feel more like a financial lifeline than a boyfriend.
Maybe I should’ve spoken up sooner. Maybe I gave too much for too long. Or maybe… this is what happens when only one person in a relationship is willing to carry the weight.
Would you keep supporting someone who refuses to meet you halfway — or is it okay to say enough is enough?
This story is part of Buzzqo’s “Real Talk” series — inspired by real relationship struggles and reimagined for deeper reflection.